Hit Me With Your Best Shoes

I have inadvertently been drawn into a shoe discussion in which I feel woefully inadequate to participate. Shoes used to be fun for me, until I was in a very bad car accident in 1994 and started having what I thought were back problems. I could no longer wear the sexy heels and funkylicious shoes to which I had become not only accustomed, but quite enamored as well. After ten years of being sent to back specialists who were unable to find what was causing me such lower back pain, and after being forced to close the private practice I had spent eleven years building up because I could no longer drive into town to see clients or sit with them for even fifty minute sessions, I was sent to a disability doctor who suggested perhaps the problem was my hip rather than my lower back. (Believe it or not, this is the short version. And I promise to tie it in with shoes, I really do.)

When I went in to see the hip doctor and he took x-rays of my right hip, he told me he was shocked I could even walk into his office unassisted. All of my cartilege was completely worn away, and the ball and socket joints were rough and ragged, causing excrutiating rubbing whenever I moved. I had the hip of an eighty year old woman, and I was 48 at the time. This explained why I'd eventually been able to do nothing but lay flat on my back, wondering if I was either nuts or had some new as-of-yet undiscovered back ailment. It was now 2004, ten years after the car accident which gave me what turned out to be osteoarthritis in my hips.

Suffice it to say, during my long tenure of pain and misdiagnosis, I had given up my fun female shoes. Gone were the funky platforms in an array of colors and leathers. Gone were the sexy "do me" pumps that elevated me to a new height of 6'4". Gone were the little metallic strappy sandals that made me feel like a Grecian queen when adorned bare legged or with shimmery sheer stockings (Oh, how I loved to go bare-legged!) I had been reduced to wearing only size 11 flats with thick pads in the soles and arch supports, eliminating any possibility of any sort of heel or open side or back.

Although the option for fun shoes has diminished, the need remains. Here are some examples of how I feed my need for shoes today. There are many more, but this is all I could provide you with as I am now recovering from another hip replacement, now on my left side, and rummaging through the closet is currently a challenge. I cannot possibly hope to compete with the penny-wise Prada-loving Prevost Princess or the money-throwing mall-loving eBay-eshewing Robin. Please accept these humble offerings with a minimum of expectation and criticisms.


The first shoes I wore after this last hip replacement of three weeks ago. They are Lands End water shoes, which I wear year round for comfort. They last forever and I like their funkiness. They are mesh on the sides so I usually wear red or floral socks, as shown. Believe it or not I get a lot of compliments on them, especially from hospital personell who are always seeking comfy footwear.


My work shoes that are similar to those found on Doreen's blog. I bought them in an army-navy store about 20 years ago and I love them. They are mens boots made of sturdy cotton mesh and grey suede, and they have steel toes. I was turned onto steel toes when I worked in a plywood factory in Wisconsin thirty years ago. They give good foot support and really extend the life of the shoe. Plus they're perfect for kicking ass when you run into those vicious shoe-robbers in dark alleys.



These are Born shoes which have a thick rubber sole and good quality suede uppers. I call Borns the straight woman's Berkenstocks. They are hand made in Mexico and are about $90 and worth every penny for foot health and comfort. This sole is about as thick as I can wear anymore, since the car accident of '94 that changed my life. I funkied these up a few years ago by painting little gold swirls all over the suede. I like to wear them with conservative slacks and jackets because I find doing so highlights their funkiness, and many people have asked me where they can buy some.

This is another pair of Borns which I like because they remind me of bowling shoes, only they're prettier and actually fit and you don't have to steal them from a bowling alley. I have this style in three different colors and these are my faves. I am very attracted to this color, as you can see from our master bedroom bedspread which serves as the background. This was also my mother's favorite color, so I guess she wasn't all bad.

Here's a cheap little pair of black leather flats with a shiny mesh fabric around the opening. I believe I bought them at Target, or Tar-Schay as psuedopretentious folks like me prefer to call it. I sewed sturdy grained cotton ribbon loops on the sides and entwined them with sheer shimmery ribbon for a ballerina effect. I decided to place the bow at the bottom of the loops instead of at the top so they poke out when I wear them with slacks. They are simple but feminine and are nice with slacks or skirts.

Well, that's it ladies. Some day I hope to be able to buy pricey shoes again, and maybe even hot sexy ones that I can really feel pretty in, but for now this is an example of what I've got. Your turns. Hit me with your best shots, er, shoes...Fire Away!