My First Beta Reader's Feedback

I sent my recently finished memoir off to three beta readers and then my sweet husband Ken surprised me by asking to read it as well. Mind you, this is a guy who's only read thrillers for the past thirty years. The only memoir he's read in all that time is James Frey's A Million Little Pieces, which he only read because of all the hype, and that doesn't count because it was fiction.

I expected Ken to dawdle and hem and haw and take forever reading my book, and maybe not even finish it, and I promised myself I would not get annoyed after spending so much time writing it and putting so much of my heart, hopes and soul into it. But then something amazing happened. Every time I looked over at Ken, he was reading. He carried the book from room to room, finding quiet corners to curl up in. Occasionally when I sneaked peeks at him I saw him smiling and a couple of times he had tears in his eyes. He even told me once that he couldn't talk right then because he was too busy reading.

Giving the book to Ken was scary because there's a lot of stuff in it that he didn't know about. Former boyfriends, mistakes I've made, details of my abusive childhood that I didn't hide but chose to take to my recovery support system rather than bothering him with it, and of course, all about my thoughts and feelings about him. Besides laying myself wide open in the book, it's scary having someone I love see my writing. We've been together twenty eight years and he's never read my writing before, because he's never asked. He doesn't read my kind of thing, so I've always just shared it with others instead.

Ken turned out to be a great beta reader. First I let him tell me about the book in his own words, and then I asked him lots of questions about it. What he offered on his own is that it was interesting, absorbing, touching and insightful. He also said he was very proud of me, he believes it is a good book, and he wants to do everything he can to help me make it a success. Then, as if that wasn't enough, as a beta reader he helped me put the whole project into perspective by answering my questions about what the logistics of the reading experience was like for him.

I want to find a great agent and sell my book and have many people read it. I hope others can benefit from my painful experiences and mistakes as well as from what I've learned along the way. I am going to do everything I can to make that happen. After all, I didn't spend all that time writing to lock my book in a dark closet somewhere. But even if nothing comes of it, I'll always have the support of my very first beta reader. It's a great feeling.

BUY Shrink Rap by Robin Altman!

Finally got around to reviewing my friend Robin Altman's book Shrink Rap on amazon.com. Here's the review, and if you have children or work with them in any capacity, please buy this book. It's hootilicious and packed with great info!

amazon review:
This book by Dr. Robin Altman is a real hoot! Shrink Rap is conveniently written in chapters titled to help parents find what ails them, or what ails their kids. All mental health problems are addressed in easily understood writing, and the touches of humor really take the bite out of what can be frustrating or frightening childhood and adolescent conditions. Some of this will really have you giggling out loud. Altman's caring for her clients and family shine through like a bright beacon and she's not afraid to laugh at herself in the process. She's also not afraid to point out frailties in her own profession, which is pretty rare in the hallowed bastions of psychiatry. Highly recommended for anyone in contact with children of all ages including babysitters, child care workers or anyone else who works with children, and would also be great for teachers and child counselors. This would be a good book for all therapists to have in their waiting room, and would also be a great gift for any of the above. - Just Another Reader

It's The Final Countdown

I am engrossed in final editing of my book, which should be done by Thursday for a beta reading. This reader has never read any of my writing, doesn't usually read memoir, and she understands that beta reading is about identifying areas that need work and not about pleasing the writer, so she's a good person to give me an objective opinion on the total project.

I started my memoir years ago but didn't really start what I consider serious writing until a little over a year ago when I discovered a couple of good writers sites online and realized that my approach had been totally wrong all along. I learned that while I thought I had a interesting story, most other people didn't, and that while I cared about the story emotionally, no one else did. That made me step back and think about the project from a different angle - a professional angle. Once I started thinking of it as work instead of as a form of therapy or some fun little thing to do, everything started coming together for me. I realized that this book is an extension of the social activism I was involved with for many years until my health started declining in 1999. Now that I have had a few surgeries and my health is getting back to normal I want to get back into that work, and this book is part of that involvement.

My goal length was 300 pages/80,000 words and I've got 380/120,000, so I've still got some serious cutting to do. The cutting isn't as painful as I thought it would be and it's helping tighten everything up so it's all for the larger cause. I always loved working on papers in college...manipulating text, creating images to convey concepts, and making the total project fit specific parameters was fun because it was like working with puzzles. Writing this book is like that too, only on a larger, more intricate scale. Now instead of being twenty pages long, my paper is three inches thick and I have it in a binder where I can keep it organized and flip from page to page as I need to.

Ae you writing and have you ever beta read? I'd love to hear all about it. If you have the time and would be interested in beta reading over the next two weeks, I'd like to hear from you about that too.

Read These Books & Leave Me Comments

Only two comments on my last blog!?! That hasn't happened to me for a long time. I hope it's not a reflection on my blog entry topic or book review skills, since here come some more...

Queen of the Road: The True Tale of 47 States, 22,000 Miles, 200 Shoes, 2 Cats, 1 Poodle, a Husband, and a Bus with a Will of Its Own

by Doreen Orion

Debuting TODAY (!), Queen of the Road details author Doreen Orion's year-long cross country bus trip with her husband and a large assortment of animals and shoes. While Orion claims to be a spoiled princess, her humor has an endearing self-effacing tone which belies her claims of sloth and superficiality. We go along with her as she not only travels through this diverse nation, but also develops a deeper appreciation for her partner's way of thinking (and cooking and cleaning and hiking.) Readers will enjoy the quirky characters Doreen and Tim meet along the way, and there are some great laugh out loud moments (you'll love her husband's ring tone nickname for her.) By the end of the book you'll have genuine affection for not only the author, but for her dear patient and highly-skilled-in-many-ways husband and their furry menagerie as well. Highly recommended reading to anyone who wants a fun book at the beach or on vacation, anyone who enjoys travel books, or anyone who enjoys reading about relationships and personal growth. This witfest would also make a great gift for just about anyone who enjoys reading for pleasure. (And doesn't she have a killer web site to boot?)

Shock Value: A Tasteful Book About Bad Taste

by John Waters

I was hoping to learn more about John Waters, the man, when I bought this book, and I was far from disappointed. This book is a great memoir of his life from start to finish, with lots of juicy inside info on all of his films. Throughout the book the reader meets all of the outrageous and delightfully politically incorrect characters that inhibit his movies and his life. There are lots of inside stories about Mink Stole, Divine, and everyone else ever seen in a Waters film, as well as the sweet low-down on that famous poop scene as well everything else you've ever wondered about. Waters is surprisingly honest about all sorts of rude and criminal acts that I'd never have known about if I hadn't read it. Underneath it all he shines through as a lovable guy who adores his hometown of Baltimore as well as the genre of trashy movies. If you love Waters, or even don't particularly like him but want to know more about him anyway, you must read this book. NOTE TO JOHN WATERS: No web site for you? C'mon big fella, get with the 1990s!

I Know You Really Love Me: A Psychiatrist's Account of Stalking

and Obsessive Love

by Doreen Orion

(Since Doreen's other book is debuting today I thought I'd give her an extra congratulatory shout out by posting this review on her older book on erotomania.) This book examines one psychiatrist's horrific experience with erotomania, a form of stalking where the pursuers carry a delusion that their victims are in love with them, despite all evidence to the contrary. Whereas most stalkers are consumed with their obsession for their victims, 10% of all stalkers are erotomanic. Through the course of the book we see the author transform from a naïve young psychiatrist to a seasoned professional, after a routine appointment with a seemingly innocuous female patient escalates into a stalking nightmare from hell. Every aspect of the author's life is eventually invaded, and all interpersonal and legal approaches to discourage the erotomanic prove fruitless. It's not unusual for erotomanics to stalk their prey for eight to ten years, and in this interesting book we get an insider's view of the entire journey. As a mental health professional, Orion does a good job with a challenging task: Sharing as much information as possible without revealing identifies or breaking the confidentiality of her patients, or in this case, further endangering herself or her loved ones. Such a terrifying experience might have conquered most professionals, and certainly most of the general public, but in writing this book Orion refuses to succumb to the victim mentality. Her selfless sharing of her own experiences provides a valuable opportunity for both professionals and lay persons to learn how to arm themselves against similar invasions. This is a great book for understanding the dynamics of erotomania from both personal and clinical perspectives. It is also a timeless book, just as pertinent today as it was when it was written. It includes many interesting examples of stalking, and erotomania in particular, involving everyday citizens as well as celebrities. This is recommended reading for anyone wanting to understand stalking in general, and erotomania in particular.